An Empty Nursery

An Empty Nursery

It’s devastating, heartbreaking and there is nothing to fill that void. All we can do is take it minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. While others move on, the daily struggle of reminders, triggers and setbacks seem to never go away as you try to slowly put back the pieces of your life without your little one. Lou Lou & Company compiled a list from their followers of how to help a mama during this horrific loss.

  1. Check in occasionally and ask “How is your heart” instead of “How are you?"

  2. Saying the baby’s name is a way to honor that baby and let’s that mama know that you acknowledge they lost an actual child, and not just the idea of a baby.

  3. Don’t say “well… at least you ___” statements. Loss is heartbreaking at every stage and mentioning that “at least you’re young”, “at least you have other children”, or “at least you weren’t full term” is belittling their pain.

  4. Be gentle and don’t take it personally if she doesn’t reach out. She is broken.

  5. Don’t say “everything happens for a reason” or “the timing must not be right.”

  6. Actions speak loudly, bringing lunch, a card or flowers lets her know that you are acknowledging her loss.

  7. Don’t try to lessen her pain by telling her about yours.

  8. Keep checking in. As people move on, she may be standing still. Months later, contact her to let her know that you haven’t forgotten.

  9. Be sensitive, she isn’t only grieving the loss of her child, but the loss of a lifetime of memories and millions of “what could’ve beens.”

  10. Don’t try to give the loss a reason and understand that grief is dealt with differently for everybody.

For the mama’s out there, I hear you, I love you, and I’m sorry for your loss. If you wish to share your story with us, we would love to hear from you and about your beautiful baby that was taken too early. Your baby’s will never be forgotten. xoxo

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